The things people say (and why they don't matter)

Since I announced I’m leaving television news at the end of 2020, people have said all kinds of crazy things to me. 

One friend specifically felt the need to warn me, saying  I will lose people I consider “friends” because, as he put it, “they’ll have no use for you anymore since you’re not in a powerful position on TV.”  Really?! I thought.  Another shared that they felt I “had it all” and questioned why on earth I would ever give up a coveted spot on-air.  Others have asked me if I think this is a smart thing to do in the middle of a pandemic. 

Honestly, none of this is a surprise to me.  As a single mom with a very public job, people have felt the urge to say anything they wanted to me over the years.  But I’ve actually already thought about what they've recently said before they even said it.  I figure, I’ll find out who is true and supportive - and who isn't.  And yes, it’s a risk!  But what’s riskier to me is NOT making the move.  Being home with my children while broadcasting from my living room showed me exactly the risk of me not being there. Plus, I will be working (I have to!).  I'll just be doing something that gives more flexibility. My children deserve to have me as much as they can. The pandemic taught so many of us that nothing is more important than home and family.  

What’s been so beautiful, though, is that aside from the skeptics, so many more friends, much to my great appreciation, shared that they believe this is 100% the right move.  One friend told me she thought it was the best decision I could’ve made, and she GAINED respect for me for choosing children as my number one priority. 

This decision has not come without fear, though.  Daily news is what I’ve known for 25 years of my life.  That is more than half of my time on earth!  I’ve been with one station for 21 of those years, and my heart is tied there.  Tied to viewers, to amazing co-workers, and to managers who worked with me to create a workable schedule.  I lived through so much there. My work was a refuge during tough times in my personal life.  It's been a second home with a work family who laughs and cries with me.  I grew up there, and my children grew up as “TV kids.”  Before the pandemic, I recall we were at a restaurant.  A random man walked up to our table, and as he was en route, my son warned, “Mom, strange viewer-person coming behind you on your left.”  The man wasn’t strange at all.  He kindly shared gratitude for my commitment to children in foster care, then left us alone.  But it pointed out a sobering truth for me, even back then. My kids have had to share me with so many people we don't even know, and even worse for them, they’ve known their place.  Number one in my heart, but number two when it came to the hours of 2:30p until nearly 8p.  Evening news dominated those hours, and nothing about that would ever change.  

I never believed until now that I had another choice. But through the coronavirus pandemic, we’ve learned there’s choice and flexibility in so many things.  We choose our attitude before we ever get out of bed. We choose gratitude, or we focus on what we don’t have.  We choose action or complaint. We choose fear or love.  We choose whether we trust in God when something new is dreamt and placed on our hearts.  We choose how to spend the precious hours each of us has been given.  We’ve all seen that if we aren’t creative and resilient during these outrageous times, we won’t make it. We’ve learned what matters to each of us.  

Initially, when we first heard the words “covid nineteen,” some of us thought, “this is the end.”  For some, it has been, in such a heartbreaking way.  For others who wondered if it really was the end, it was an opportunity to re-define who we are and where our focus belongs. Mine is on “home” and a son and daughter who are now #1 every day, every hour of the day. 

With that as my priority, does it really matter if a lose a friend based on whether I’m on TV?  Do I really have it all if what's important is out of line? If I don’t make a change now, then when? 

We have one go around (I think).  I have to believe at the end of mine, I won’t be wishing I spent more hours on television and will simply wish I had more time home, with the ones who matter most.