Monday, December 16, 2019

A Letter to My Son on His 13th Birthday


In a few days, you'll officially be a teenager, and there are a few things you should know…

First, you are my greatest blessing.  You were the little life that first made me a mom!  I will never forget the day I found out about you.  Your father and I lived in our lovely, quaint Queen Anne home in Seattle.  I was in the tiny downstairs bathroom when I saw the two pink lines begin to form on the pregnancy test. I sat in wonder, bursting with tears.  When your dad and I went for an ultrasound to make sure you were a healthy baby, your father spotted it first, even before the technician.  You were a boy, he said!  Neither of us had ever been as excited about anything in our whole lives.

I craved Nacho Cheese Doritos and Lay’s Potato Chips for 9 months.  Don’t you notice, if I ever even buy a bag nowadays, they’re gone within a day?  I blame you…

There was a possibility you’d be a Christmas baby, but you came early, on the 21st, the Winter Solstice.  The Solstice marks the start of winter, and after the 21st, the days start getting longer.  We would learn later, you ALWAYS love cold weather.


You were a night owl, from the time we brought you home from the hospital.  You refused to sleep unless you were held.  To this day, who is the last one in bed at night? 😊



We’ve had the privilege of watching you grow into a young man who is witty, sensitive, wicked-smart, friendly, selfless, helpful, and calm.  Your athletic ability is good, and you have the potential to be great, with hard work and perseverance.  One of your coaches told me one time that “it just comes easy for him.”  And another teacher told me to “protect his brain, he’s a smart one.”



I’ve watched you assist others who struggle, without being asked.  I’ve seen you remain quiet when you could’ve easily snapped back.  I’ve witnessed you L O V E big, especially when the person on the receiving end may not seem deserving. 

Here’s my advice: 

ALWAYS remain true to yourself.  There’s something my grandfather used to tell me:  “This above all; to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”  In other words, if you know who YOU are, you won’t be false -or lie- to anyone else around you.  Just be you.  

WORK HARD.  Expect NOTHING in return for it.  You are not entitled to anything.  The world owes you nothing.  You are only in control of your attitude and the behavior and effort you show yourself and others.  When you do put in extra, you will be rewarded.  BUT, remain humble.

THE WORLD WILL BREAK YOUR HEART.  Sometimes, sweetie, you won’t get what -or who- you want.  But God always gives you what you need.  Show gratitude.  It’s the only appropriate response.

ALWAYS SHOW RESPECT and KNOW YOUR PLACE.  Know when it’s appropriate to be funny.  Know when it’s not.  Respect your parents, grandparents, your friends’ parents, your teachers, coaches, and peers.  LISTEN, and don’t always feel the urge to talk and explain.  Have compassion for people you encounter.

UNPLUG.  Read books.  You’ve always loved to read.  Sit in silence and BE BORED.  There’s plenty of time for phones and computers, but I want you to remember what it’s like to be alone, with just you. 

NEVER FORGET WHERE HOME IS.  I know you want to travel far and wide.  But always remember where you came from.  Always know that home is wherever your family is.  I will be there for you wherever this life takes you.  Here to celebrate, here to offer a shoulder to lean on when life gets hard, here to listen to you, here to support you, and forever -until my very last breath- here to love you. Don't ever forget who you represent.

Take these words and weave them into the life you are just beginning to create.  As you start these teenage years, you will learn big things and have amazing experiences.  You will also make mistakes and have regrets.  What I always want you to remember is this – you walk around this world with a piece of my heart, and that means I am ALWAYS with you - to support and love you all along the way. 

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, my sweet, precious first-born boy ~

Momma





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