Do Ticks Have Wings?

It's been awhile, y'all. Thanks for all your love, support, and for repeatedly telling me to just "get on here and write from your heart!"  I apologize you had to wait more than a year for this. 

CONFESSION:  I've sat here so many times, typed out paragraphs, then deleted it all and just said, "forget it." It's that self-critical voice deep in my head, lying to me and saying, "no one really cares what you have to say," Or, "oh they'll just judge you if you write honestly about that." Or, "why bother? Everyone struggles, I'm no different; nothing special here."

And y'all, when that last thought came up, about how everyone struggles, I realized that's the exact reason I need to get on here and type.  Words and stories unite us, make us feel like we're not alone.  Make us see that both good and bad happen to all of us.  Grief and loss, love and light, goodness and peace, hurts and mistakes, along with forgiveness and faith are universal emotions and experiences.  None of us is immune.  None of us gets a free pass from even one of these occasions.

Soooooooooooooooooooo...  Off my pontificating for a moment.  On to last night's "girls night."

Not to worry.  It wasn't a cray-cray, 40-something momma's night out with friends (when does that ever happen?!).  My baby girl and I were afforded the rare chance for dinner and dessert, just the two of us.  My boy is at camp, so she is reveling in my full attention this week!

We were taking some selfies and started looking through pictures on my iPhone, when she ran across one of her daddy and I when we were in our 20s (her father and I have been divorced for years, as catalogued here in a previous post).  A funny look came across her face, and I asked why.  She said, "I just can't see you two together!"  Not in a bad way.  In fact, she kind of chuckled.  Then, she set the phone down and said, "but I'm glad you're good friends now!"  It's true.  Her daddy and I are dear friends, indeed.  The way we both ended up seeing it was, you can't spend two decades around another human being, share children, and then just erase history. 

I could tell that my baby girl was in "listening mode."  You know, those moments where you can just see that your child is ripe and ready to hear exactly what you have to say?  I took full advantage, and I said, "you know, honey, people come together in life for all different reasons.  To love.  To learn. To grow."

She was really listening.

I went on.  "Your dad and I believe wholeheartedly that we were brought together so that God could put you and your brother here on earth." (And I do believe this myself).

She looked at me, and I fully thought she was going to ask a profound question or make a big-time comment about what I'd just said. 

Instead, she said, "Mom.  Do ticks have wings?" 😂

I burst into laughter.  Then she started laughing.  We both ended up laughing so hard that our tummies hurt!  

She wanted to know because a bug landed on her earlier in the day that looked like a tick, but then it flew away. 

I realized at that moment to enjoy and savor every second she will give me right now.  To worry less about "staunch" discipline, what the parenting books say, and simply teach love and to recognize the true gift of being present with your children.  Because if I know anything in life, it's that the only constant is change.  And very soon, she will be way more into her friends than a night out with her momma. 

Everyone has an opinion about how you should raise your children.  Most of the time, they aren't afraid to tell you about it.   I don't really care anymore what "they" think.  I hope you don't either.  I know that a whole lotta love, a whole lotta listening, a whole lotta "being there," and a whole lot of talking and understanding are working in our favor right now. 

I know that each of you is having your own life experience right now.  Back to where I started:  we are all struggling with something, and this little blog post is my way of saying you are NOT alone.  I hope you know I'm sending prayers and love to each of you on your precious way! 

Promise it won't be another year before I post... 

xoxo

My and my girl on our night out!

"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth..." ~ Kahlil Gibran