I had never met
15-year old Ryan.
Our shoot was set up for 2 o'clock in the afternoon at the Big
Rock Fun Park. I never know what situation I may be stepping into or what a
child may or may not be like when I meet them for the first time. DHS typically
sends me an information sheet about the child. It includes things they like,
whether they have siblings, and a little about their background.
So I'm always
a little nervous.
I can't imagine how hard it would be to be a foster child.
Much less up for adoption. Much less the feature and focus of a news story to
help me find a family. So, as a television journalist, when I walk into these
situations I'm always very sensitive to that. I want the child or children I'm
interacting with to feel comfortable and not intimidated by me or a television
camera.
But in some cases the children are in tears. In some cases, especially younger children, they don't fully understand, and they are just excited to play. In any case, it is nerve-racking, to say the least.
But in some cases the children are in tears. In some cases, especially younger children, they don't fully understand, and they are just excited to play. In any case, it is nerve-racking, to say the least.
So it was Monday afternoon, and I walked into
the fun park to meet Ryan. I was told he was 15-years old and loved to play
games. I had seen a photo of him, and that was it. You can imagine my
surprise when he literally ran up to me and gave me a giant hug before I could even
walk through the front door! It was me this time who was nearly in tears. Here is a child who had grown up in foster care, with nothing but a smile on his
face. He was so excited to meet me and to play.
The first thing he said was, "I already have my tokens, are you
ready?" Little did I know he was going to beat me at every single game we
played. Basketball, air hockey, every game you can imagine, he won. What I noticed
most about Ryan, is that from the time he gave me a hug until the time our afternoon
was over, he never stopped smiling. Even when he talked about having to go into
foster care and now being up for adoption.
For me, it's always such an awkward question for me
to ask. "What kind of family do you want?" Because for most of us, it's not a question we have to answer. We have our family. But these are children who think about getting a "new one" from the time they wake up
in the morning until the time they go to sleep at night. All because they were failed by their own blood. Ryan's response to that question echoes among so many in his situation: "..to have a good home that takes care of me and always loves me. I really don't care, as long as I have a home to go to."
I wanted to cry for
him again. And just between you and me, in many cases I do go home and cry. Because
for every Ryan, there are 500 more in our state in his exact shoes. To see a boy
who is so loving, so sweet, with such polite manners, working through the
difficulties of his situation and navigating the world, a world which has not
been pretty for him, to see him still smile --- this is what inspires me to do the work that we do every day through "A Place to Call Home." It leaves a gratitude in my heart to be
in a situation in which I can play a small role at a critical time.
So what I hope for now is
one open heart, one set of eyes that sees his story, one family that opens its
arms, says "yes," and welcomes Ryan home.
I really do enjoy reading your blogs. Keep up the good work !
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